i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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