i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
