Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize