i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
