But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
