she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize