I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
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for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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