Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Randomize
