R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
