i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
did i walk over a car last night?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
