we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize