I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
