I'm really into asian looking animals
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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