You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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