Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Randomize
