Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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