He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize