he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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