I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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