a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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