If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize