is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
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