Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
