yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
