You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
