I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
