my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
