We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
