i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
