I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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