those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
