Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
