when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Randomize
