I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
