I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
