Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
