Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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