doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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