everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
