Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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