super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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