no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize