3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
