better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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