ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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