Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
