You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize