why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
