She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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