How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
