I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
